College can be hard, and I'm not just talking about the classes or exams. On top of being a student, you're you. Whether you're shy or confident, I'm going to give you a glimpse of what the social scene is like at the Mount and how to stop overthinking the little things when making friends.
Despite being small, we are mighty. The Mount has no shortage of activities, opportunities and unique people who become lifelong friends. The energy we have is unlike any other and cannot be matched. You will feel it the moment you arrive. You will feel it if you put yourself out there and see what this beautiful place has to offer.
When I got to the Mount, I was not phased by anything. I am a military brat, so I am used to moving in and out, as well as being separated from my family for periods of time. I started new schools every few months to few years, so starting fresh was like clockwork. I found my people and plenty of roles I could fill very quickly. People came up to me a lot during my first semester asking, "How do you do it?"
Well for one, confidence or shyness is all in your head. People overthink their interactions with others far too much. No one is going to remember that slight slip up of saying "have a good day!" instead of "have a good night!" during the dinner rush at Patriot. Only people who are not worth your effort and friendship are put off by that weird fun fact you mentioned as a conversation starter (which believe me, very, very few would be). The people who are worth your time are the ones who will love you as you are when you get here and trust me, there are plenty of us!
Believe it or not, I was socially awkward when I was in elementary school. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome at the age of nine, and since then, I have worked hard to improve my interactions with others. One of the best things you can do is forget all the thoughts of "what if" and put yourself in those situations. Go up to a random person and say hello. Go to that event alone and approach a group that came together. Start a conversation with a classmate you recognize from one of your classes. Go up to that person sitting alone during lunch or dinner and ask to sit with them. As scary as that sounds, that's how I learned and became the person I am now. So do it. Do what I did and just put yourself out there. Forget what makes you shy or awkward (if you are) and just do it.
Second, while I pride myself as the girl who knows nearly everyone on campus and can make friends easily, I confess that I too, have a social battery. If you're reading this, you may be nervous about making friends. You could be an introvert. And that's okay! While I exude extrovert vibes, I need my alone time some days. Luckily this semester, after a morning work shift and two classes, I have a two-hour gap where I can catch up on my Netflix series or do some self-care before my last class and one of my extracurricular commitments.
Third, there is no "social hierarchy," so ditch the high school concept before you get here. Everyone has their groups, but you can be friends with a mixture of people. I certainly am! I have my main, close friends group, and then, I have many others everywhere else. A lot of new freshmen (as I've noticed) in August stress so much about who's who and getting in with the "main crowd" when in reality, there isn't any. As a senior, I have never stopped making friends in my four years. Even if you don't click with someone freshman year doesn't mean you won't sophomore or junior year.
So, to close this week's post, I say you do not have to stress about making friends. And even if you still find yourself struggling, there are orientation leaders, peer mentors and many other student leaders who are here to help you. It is not an exaggeration that the Mount is small but mighty. There are so many resources and opportunities despite its size. I hope this builds your excitement and dispels your nervousness a little bit. College is for getting your degree, but it's also so much fun. I can easily say that these four years have been some of the best of my life.
I'll see ya in the next one!